F*ed up Tests and Favorite Teachers

So, about that essay I was supposed to write yesterday... turns out it was an essay test.  When I found this out right after class ended, I was horrified.  I ran home immediately after school and had it written within an hour and a half.  I've never skipped a test before.  I couldn't believe what I'd done when heard the other kids talking about this being the third TEST in AP Lit and Comp this week. 

We're going to start reading Shakespeare next; Hamlet in specific, I think.  I will diligently take notes and read everything I'm supposed to this time! 

For Snow Week (similar to homecoming week, only based around Valentine's Day) we have dress up days all week.  So far we've had Pajama day, Crazy Socks day, College Jersey day, and today is Dress Like Your Favorite Teacher today.  This is the only day I've dressed up for all week.  A teacher of mine and I are wearing all-matching jeans, black shoes, blue shirts, and black cardigans.  We have the same short haircut too, but my hair is purple.  She is much thinner than I am too. I wish I were as thin as her.  I'm just built a little bigger than her.  My bones are turned out wider or something.  She has a narrow, European face; tiny, willowy limbs; and a super skinny torso.  Her hands are long, thin, and graceful.  When I hug her I can feel her bones through her shirt.  She used to be anorexic in college.  I know she's not really anymore, but it still makes me nervous being able to feel her bones all over.  She seems so fragile. 
 

I adore her, though.  She's beautiful, really smart, cultured, and has a really fun personality.  She reminds me of my sister a little bit.  We're very close.  I've learned a lot from her... We email back and forth all day most days, and if I don't email her over the weekend she usually comments on it and asks me what I did over the weekend. 
 

 

Tonight I'm going to gay group.  I'm so excited! I haven't been there in ages.  I always have play practice on Thursday nights, so I'm not able to go, but I have a break between the One Act play and the spring play to go two or three times. 
 

I miss my friends, I want a hug from my ex-girlfriend... Life has been rough lately.  I'm having issues with my friends at school.  I know, I know, everyone goes through that.  Here's the thing though: friends for me are few and far between.  So when two of them exclude me and start keeping secrets from me, serious damage is done.  I cry a lot.  It's really quite pathetic, but its true.  I'm miserable without them.  My heart is breaking and I feel as though my very soul is bleeding.  It hurts.  It hurts the most because they won't tell me why they're treating me this way.  They're making very vague excuses and I know something's up.  I hate it.  :( I need a hug. 
 

High School Monarchy

I would LOVE to go up to one of these girls wearing a tiara and a frosty smile, slap them across the face and say “Congratulations on winning the popularity contest!” It’s that time of year again, folks… as if homecoming weren’t stupid enough; we have to have Snow Week as well.  Snow Week at my school consists of five dress-up days, the election of the Snow Week king & queen, and the Snow Ball dance. 

When the ballots came out to vote for candidates for Snow Week court, I voted for all the least popular people on the class list.  I didn’t expect any of the students I voted for to win, of course, but one can always dream.  I dream of a day when the social balance is hugely disturbed and some unfortunate-looking girl with poorly colored hair and braces can put on a fancy dress and link arms with a mathlete wearing his dad’s suit. 

 

If you’re reading this, and you’re popular, I’m not really sorry for having offended you.  Don’t you think you’ve had enough?  Isn’t enough that you have the most money, the most disciples (no, they’re not really friends, they’re accessories), the prettiest face, the best hair, and the nicest clothes?  Share your glory.  Believe me, when you graduate from high school and go out into the real world, you’ll wish you had that little bit of karma on your side. 

The bullying that goes on in high school is ridiculous.  It has to stop.  Perhaps electing kings and queens for school events isn’t exactly bullying, but it certainly doesn’t make the bullied feel any better.  It just lets us know that we’re not good enough.  You know, some people didn’t even appear on the Snow Week ballot?  The student senate forgot about them.  That is so sad. 

I’m really frustrated about this, and I want to write more – hopefully I’ll get to later.  But right now, I have homework. Grr!!!